Week 3—We See the World as We See Ourselves
We See the World As We See Ourselves. Knowing this empowers us.
It can tell us who’s a good guy, and who’s a bad guy. Who we can trust, and who we can’t.
For example, an honest person is going to see the world as basically honest. But a person who lies and cheats all the time will assume that everyone lies and cheats.
And it’s better to do it to them before they do it to you!
This also impacts our opinions.
We always think when someone gives us their opinion about something, we’re learning about that “something.” But we’re not. We’re really learning about them.
The opinion giver.
Let’s say you have a friend, Person A, who you know pretty well. And then you meet a new person, Person B, and they give you their opinion about Person A.
Now, unless Person B is bringing some new data or information to the discussion, you’re not going to learn anything new about Person A. You already know them!
BUT you’re going to learn a lot about Person B. This new person. And their subjective opinion.
Let’s say I were to introduce you to FIVE different people — all at the same time. And later, I asked those five people a whole bunch of questions about you. There’s a good chance I’m going to get five very different opinions about you.
She’s real interesting… Kinda boring… Pretty funny… Very sharp… Not too bright…
How is that even possible?? How can there be five different opinions about you… you’re only one person!
One ACTION. So there should be one equal and opposite reaction.
But there’s not. There’s five of them!
And what that means is, people’s opinions about us tell us more about THEM than they do US.
And that’s important to know.
Now, obviously, if you walk into a store and pull out a machete, and start swinging it around, everyone there is pretty much going to have the exact same opinion about you:
But apart from those moments when our survival instincts bring us all together, opinions are pretty subjective.
They’re based on our own experiences.
There is no better or faster way to figure out who someone really is, and what they’re all about, than to remember: We See the World As We See Ourselves.
Just reverse the process when you meet someone, and let their opinions tell you all about them.
Yessss. Keep talking. I’m learning here!
For now I’ll just say, if you want to live in a fair and just world… be fair and just!
And you will.
— Whenever I meet someone and they start going on and on about how rotten people are, how people are no damn good, I’m always tempted to say, Hey buddy, do me a favor. STOP seeing the world as you see yourself. Okay? For my sake!
(of course, that’s a good way to get your butt kicked, if they can figure out what you’re talking about, so you might want to hold off on that)
— Have you ever noticed a tendency of people to accuse others of something which they themselves are guilty? When someone says, “You always think you’re right”… 99 times out of 100… they always think they’re right! That’s why they’re so quick to see it in others.
— “Most times, a man will tell you his bad intentions if you listen, let yourself hear.” Kevin Costner, OPEN RANGE (2003)